How It’s Done Blog

Update from the John

tones and ringtones message free In early party line systems this pattern was tones and ringtones message free code letter indicating who should pick up the phone, but today, with individual lines, the only surviving patterns are a single ring and double-ring, originally Morse code letters T and M respectively. banana ringtones Many of these sites are camouflaged to blend with existing environments, particularly in scenic areas. ringtones free mustang 3 billion by November, 2007[9], thus reaching ringtones free mustang […]

The Triumph of Optimism over Experience (Again)

The most popular jogging route in town runs right past our front door. On a beautiful spring day, you can’t help but look at the people running by and find yourself somehow convinced that they are having fun–that their shins do not hurt and their hearts are not pounding and their lungs are not crying for mercy. Or at least, I can’t. I put Lily into the jog stroller and set out on the 3-mile loop. Is it possible to […]

Imaginary Money

I love spending imaginary money. Usually I do it in catalogs, but today I took the imaginary money total to new and greater heights than it’s ever been before. It started out with a simple patio. I’ve been wanting a patio since we moved here, and a few weeks ago I decided to actually take a few steps in that direction. So I called Brian, who did a little tractor work for us last spring. Brian was the dream tractor […]

Watching the build-up the Rose Bowl made me remember one of my favorite techniques for handling the many, and nearly always male, detectives and cops I worked with in the NYC District Attorney’s office. My boyfriend/husband was an ESPN addict, and although I had no trouble tuning out SPorts Night, some of it invariably sunk in–and it went farther to create a rapport than anything I could have done short of growing a penis and turning Irish. If I were […]

I Have Been Tagged

So, although I’m taking the blog in a new direction (with a new look!) any day now, I will take this opportunity to tell you, as demanded, 6 Weird/Freaky/Embarrassing Things About Me. And then I will tag 6 people. And then they will come back and tell me that they’ve written 6 Weird Things about themselves, and I will go and read them, and snort. But this is my new improved blog about feeding the Devils’ minds and bodies! So, […]

Hey–What Happened to You?

Lots…so posting is, has been and is likely to be slow. We bought a house…which means cleaning. Big time. The house must appear spacious and full of storage, like a dream from a Pottery Barn catalog. With toys. Maybe a Pottery Barn kids catalog. Which means work, and lots of it. And don’t even get me started on the plans for the new place! There’s not THAT much…but its not nothing. So if you’re wondering where I am… xanax buy […]

I Don’t Have to Pretend to Like Basketball Anymore! Or Strippers!

Because I have just realized that I am sufficiently cool, just the way i am. Really quite extremely cool. Probably much cooler than you, no matter how much you know about sports or how quickly you can drink a shot. I went to a college (Kansas State) with a decent team, a rivalry, star players, etc. Camped out in line for tickets. Learned the name of the coach. Went to games. Kept up, afterwards, sufficient knowledge to participate in conversations […]

Wy’s first cone

Wy’s first cone Originally uploaded by kjda.

The end of the perfect playdate

The end of the perfect playdate Originally uploaded by kjda. KJ

On Halloween

On Halloween Originally uploaded by kjda. KJ

Wyatt in the snow

Wyatt in the snow Originally uploaded by kjda. KJ Dell’Antonia (Please attribute any drastic spelling and punctuation errors to my poor thumb-typing and creative autocorrect.)

Wyatt is Two!

Today is his official birthday, which we marked with a cake from Lou’s, balloons and a few presents–what Lily called “the family party, because nobody else is coming.” He’s a delight, a fabulous kid. In fact, I’m enjoying them all even more than ever, maybe because with the end of skiing season I’ve been able to return to working more, maybe because they’re getting bigger…who knows why, but things are good! And spring is near. Outside play, days without boots, […]

Just like Lily

Just like Lily Originally uploaded by kjda. KJ Dell’Antonia (Please attribute any drastic spelling and punctuation errors to my poor thumb-typing and creative autocorrect.)

“is this the ting-iest?”

"is this the ting-iest?" Originally uploaded by kjda. KJ Dell’Antonia (Please attribute any drastic spelling and punctuation errors to my poor thumb-typing and creative autocorrect.)

At the top of Holts

At the top of Holts Originally uploaded by kjda. KJ Dell’Antonia (Please attribute any drastic spelling and punctuation errors to my poor thumb-typing and creative autocorrect.)


Haircuts! Originally uploaded by kjda. KJ Dell’Antonia

Wyatt licks sugar off the counter

Wyatt licks sugar off the counter Originally uploaded by kjda. Sam is home sick. It’s 4:00, and I am just…tired of being in charge. Since I intend to end the day with a full on TV binge, it’s a little early to start. And so things slowly deteriorate…

Just another classical evening

Tonight Sam and Lily were back in Mandarin class. Rob drew the short straw, so he came home with grumpy Wyatt to put him to bed (I can tell he’s peeved, because he’s on the upstairs computer, not the downstairs), while me and my laptop hung out at the Dartmouth arts building (nice view of the green, comfy chairs, excellent wireless). As I lingered, responding to email, syncing calendars, etc., a student came in to practice on the grand piano. […]

How to keep flower girls and ring bears happy

How to keep flower girls and ring bears happy Originally uploaded by kjda Last wedding, we were not prepared. In the interval between photos and the ceremony, we dismantled an entire room in a synagogue. After the ceremony and before the food was served, we ate the centerpieces, and the whole thing nearly turned into the Donner Party. This time we were prepared! KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

Somewhere Above Russia….

9 hours into the flight, and Wyatt has slept a little. We tried out the CARES/Kids Fly Safe seat belts. They are vastly easier to transport than a carseat but somewhat less comfy. Bug successes while the kids were awake, but when it came time to curl up in the seat and sleep, the chest strap gets in the way—being little, they don’t really have to stay upright. Overall, I’d call it a good purchase, though. Good for turbulance (we […]

Our Breakfast Looks Better than Rob’s

Our Breakfast Looks Better than Rob’s Originally uploaded by kjda This morning features a group of about 10 people exercising together. E, R, San, Se they count. I don’t think they would like it if we joined them. One Chinese American joined in, but briefly. These are the famed morning exercises, done at schools, factories, businesses, and they all know the routine, but they applaud their leader anyway. It’s hot today, hot hot hot. When one of the kids runs […]

Here she is

Here she is Originally uploaded by kjda Utterly fearless. KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

Visit me at Double X

I’ve got a post up at Double X. If the Lives essay in last Sunday’s NYT magazine made you want to slap the young writer around for her own good, it’s for you.

Rory’s Other Mother

How weird must it be, to talk to your kid’s new mom about what she was like as a baby? Is it akin to giving your husband’s new wife a call to tell her what he likes in bed? Only Rory’s other mother knows, and she’s not telling. Because she is a kind person, and because, I suppose, we both know it would change nothing. The way it is is the way it is. She belonged with her first family […]

Actually I Was Wrong

Actually I Was Wrong Originally uploaded by kjda They found a way to totally enjoy this thing together. Rory likes being tipped over. KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

The Candy Addict Sleeps

The Candy Addict Sleeps Originally uploaded by kjda Everyone chose something at the Chatham Candy Manor for the ride home. Rory’s choice–a long twisty lollipop. Which she did not lick–she ate. Bite, crunch. Three minutes into the ride, we turned around to find this. KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

Consequences, baby.

I totally love Rory now–no hesitation–which makes it ok for me to say this: sometimes I like being mean to her. In a totally virtuous way, of course. I just reviewed the dvd of Olivia for DoubleX, and in one episode, Olivia refuses to wear her soccer shirt–she doesn’t like dressing like everyone else-and she’s rewarded, in the end, by getting to play goalie and saving the game, and I just wanted to slap that pig upside the ears. Sometimes […]

Where in the World is KJ

Where in the World is KJ Originally uploaded by kjda Boston. Not a big trip, or an unusual one, but it’s always nice to visit a different Starbucks once in a while. The word of the day at our house this morning was compromise–and it’s a good one. We are all easing up on our need to have e rything exactly the way we want it to be. Breakfast, for example, was not precisely what Rory had in mind. Instead […]

Family of Four/Six

I’m over thinking I’m not cut out to be Rory’s mom, I think. My new thing is that I’m not cut out to be the mother of four. Although… Rob was out of town for the last two nights. I think he’s been away a few times since Rory arrived, but this is the first time since school started in earnest, and in a full-on, all-out week–the week with nightly swim lessons. It’s a biannual occurrence that makes me simultaneously […]

The Art (Thanks, Sculpey!)

The Art (Thanks, Sculpey!) Originally uploaded by kjda Wait until you see our “Halloween Tree.” what, you don’t have one? KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

Being means WAY more than acting.

There’s been a shift again. Emotion is nothing if not seismic in this family, but this has been a nice, gradual drifting of continents. Rory likes to perform, but sometimes I have felt that she was putting on a father frantic show for us–a show of happiness, a show of belonging, as if her performing it would convince us all. Sometimes she’d be just sitting there, kind of expressionless, and I’d look at her, and I’d get this frantic grin—not […]

How to Become a Patient Flyer

How to Become a Patient Flyer Originally uploaded by kjda Once you’ve flown halfway around the world and back with three or four kids, a little matter of a 2 plus hour delay is nothing when you’re sans spawn. Lalala, we said at each successive delay. Magazines were read. Burgers were eaten. And eventually, a functional plane was located, we flew, and here we are. Watching the other traveler get all bent out of shape was just gravy. KJ Dell’Antonia […]

The Unbearable Unfairness of Windows

It gets dark early, here. Which means if we go anywhere in the warm, cozy car, all snuggled into our car seats, any time after 4:30…sleep is very likely to overtake both Rory and Wyatt. And I am sorry, but you CANNOT NAP after 4:30 here. In fact, you really can’t nap at all, with occasional exceptions for illness, early dozing off on long rides and planned late nights. And the one thing one hundred percent guaranteed to wake up […]

Deep Breaths and Holiday Concerts

Me, solo usually translates to me, shrieking, but tonight Rob missed Sam’s holiday concert–which means me and Lily, Rory and Wyatt all bundled into our chairs for an hour and a half, collectively wondering “why they sing one more song? Why?” and “When is it time to go home?” as we watch K-8 each step up for their time on stage. Some of us just wonder it a little more audibly than others. That, plus pizza, would usually be a […]

In Which Sam Learns that Sometimes You Don’t WANT to Know

I didn’t lie. I never lie to them, but I do sin by ommission, as it were. We did have to leave early this morning. There was a “because.”  Everyone did need to go brush their teeth before the usual alarm. No one really needed to know why. But Sam guessed, and guessed right. The final flu shots lay in wait.

Not Cold

Not Cold Originally uploaded by kjda Sitting at the rink, eating ice cream, no coat–but these warm jammies. KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

Check out the Player of the Game!

Check out the Player of the Game! Originally uploaded by kjda KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

Powerpuff Girls

Powerpuff Girls Originally uploaded by kjda Bubbles and Blossom. Buttercup won’t play… Which, if you know anything at all about the Powerpuff Girls, is totally typical. You should have heard Lily–oops, Blossom–“but we need someone with beautiful black hair like Buttercup!” “No! I don’ wanna!” I think she would have done it if Lily hadn’t demanded that she dress up. She’d already spent ten reluctant minutes as a fairy. Rory likes to be comfy. I have been cleaning out closets, […]

Our lives if we still lived in NYC

Our lives if we still lived in NYC Originally uploaded by kjda KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

Gruna Lunda

Gruna Lunda Originally uploaded by kjda Note that it’s 9 pm and still this light! KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

Last Day of Strawberry Picking

Last Day of Strawberry Picking Originally uploaded by kjda KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

Guilt and Everything After.

Am I the only person out there that walks through her days with this constant load of guilt? I swear it’s why my back hurts all the time. My personal sack of guilt is so heavy that during the few moments of the week when it lifts, I think I should step on the scale. I literally walk through town with my shoulders drooping. I often have to remind myself that no, whatever I am doing at that moment is […]

That’s ok, Veruca, Daddy Will Buy You a Job

It sounds like the ultimate in helicopter parenting—not to mention the ultimate bad idea. If your fashion-design major daughter can’t get a job, why not buy her one? The Wall Street Journal is reporting on what might be a recession trend: parents “giving their kids the business.” Buying a “Pita Pit” (surely the subliminal 90210 reference is intentional; who could resist the mental image of Brenda’s dad handing over the keys?), a “College Hunks Hauling Junk,” or a “Fibrenew” franchise […]

ReEntry is hard…

We got back from vacation so late last night that there was no bedtime rountine, only bed. Tonight we had routine, only I decided to switch it up a bit: on vacation, I started reading them nightly chinks of a chapter book (The Four Story Mistake). Everyone liked it…on vacation. But now that we’re back, Rory wanted…well, I don’t know what she wanted, exactly, but suffice it to say it was not the chapter when Oliver brings out the sleds […]

Back to School: Mistakes Were Made

But minor ones… Let me first say, as an aside, that Blueberry Shrub, a drink I made after reading a wildly enthusiastic description of it in the NYT magazine, tastes very much like something you would make Easter Eggs in. I don’t know why I’m surprised…I think I will try using it in salad dressing. That said, I am sitting here drinking it and having Paz flashbacks. Mistakes: first of all, we allowed I sufficient prep time last night between […]

When Things Refuse to Stay the Same

Last week, Rory’s beloved babysitter, who is pregnant with her third, was put on bed rest. From Rory’s point of view, she disappeared with no warning–I was traveling, and it was all we could do to get all the kids and their needs covered, let alone get Rory over to see her Heather. We explained, of course we did, but Rory was bit suspicious and very clearly thrown off course. She liked all the activities that filled in for Heather, […]

When an Impediment Is NOT an Impediment

Sometimes it seems like I learn all my parenting lessons from kids in the back seat. This morning, after we dropped off Sam and Lily, I heard Rory determinedly repeating to Wyatt in the back seat what sounded like “FPLIDT, Wyatt, FPLIDT!” “What?” Wyatt was asking. “What do you want me to do?” “FPLIDT!” “Spit? Hit?” This went on for some minutes, and I thought I heard Rory getting frustrated. She has a small speech difficulty, and any double consonants […]

Coming soon: one gingerbread house

Coming soon: one gingerbread house Originally uploaded by kjda KJ Dell’Antonia sent from my iPhone

Smart Things, Nice People, Small Town

Showed up at pick up today–on time, swear– to find Lily in tears and Sam worrying. “I SAID you told us not to ride the bus,” he declared, but they wanted us to ride it anyway! I TOLD them you always forget to call…” Whoops. In my defense, my day was so packed and one thing after another that I didn’t even drink COFFEE until after noon and I never did get that shower. Working up to that now. But […]

Take Your Coat Off!

Proof positive that I am still WAY to attached to my way of doing things: both Lily and Rory like to keep their coats in in the house and in restaurants (but not, of course, at the grocery store). And it bugs me. It is not really a big deal. It is not really ANY deal. Generally, they hang them up when they do take them off, or when asked. Yes, they get food on them, but since they also […]