fbpx

The Thanksgiving Weight-loss Plan

1) Eat all meals with eighteen-month-old on your lap. Succumb to her demand that you give her all the good bits. Martyr yourself by refusing to let anyone else sit with misbehaving child in the car.
2) Visit someone who, if that person saw the way you usually eat while pregnant, might say things like “oh, of course you can eat that way, but I have to be careful.” Which almost sounds like a complement–but isn’t. It’s one of those things best left unsaid.
3) Bring children to a gathering of childless adults or parents of adult children, all of whom are variously more interesting, more accomplished and better traveled than you are feeling, as, in order to maintain the peace, you read “Peek-a-Whoo?” for the eleventh time.
3) Have the main meal at the children’s table. Listen to the distant conversation of the grown-ups. Realize you have nothing to contribute in any case.
4) No gravy.

I’m struggling here with the ever-present anonymity question. If my blog were anonymous, I might say more–but suffice it to say that I did not, for various reasons including the fact that Lily spent one night vomiting all over the place, particularly enjoy my Thanksgiving. I found it difficult to be thankful. Generally speaking, I just about managed resentful. For the most part, this was no one’s fault but my own, and probably added to no one’s enjoyment of the party, either. I was a surly, sleep-deprived presence, capable of only momentary bursts of intelligence or graciousness. And don’t anyone tell me I wasn’t, because I dont want to hear it.


686 Responses to “The Thanksgiving Weight-loss Plan”

  1. JK says:

    I’m sorry. Not sure what else to say.

  2. Griffon says:

    You’re Thanksgiving sounds vaguely like mine. I actually lost 2 lbs (though the breastfeeding helps, surely). My husbands family all wanted turns holding the baby but didn’t want to keep her once she started fussing. So I would calm her down, someone would take her and rock her too much or not enough until she cried, then pass her back to me. My husband asked me today if I was happy (other than being happy as a wife and mother).. And it occured to me that I’m happy if I find enough time to do laundry or wash dishes during the baby’s naps and that I hadn’t even had time to think about my own accomplishments in a while. Sigh. It gets easier, right?

  3. Griffon says:

    Your Thanksgiving sounds vaguely like mine. I actually lost 2 lbs (though the breastfeeding helps, surely). My husbands family all wanted turns holding the baby but didn’t want to keep her once she started fussing. So I would calm her down, someone would take her and rock her too much or not enough until she cried, then pass her back to me. My husband asked me today if I was happy (other than being happy as a wife and mother).. And it occured to me that I’m happy if I find enough time to do laundry or wash dishes during the baby’s naps and that I hadn’t even had time to think about my own accomplishments in a while. Sigh. It gets easier, right?

  4. sam says:

    Oh gosh, I can really relate to #3. I can’t wait until those people have kids or grandkids of their own and I can look at their kids as if they’re the most annoying presence on earth, as if just being little kids and just being a mother isn’t good enough. And what I really can’t wait for is to turn to an obviously tired, overworked & underappreciated mother and ask her what she does with her time. Ha! I love that question.

  5. Thanks for very interesting article. btw. I really enjoyed reading all of your posts. It’s interesting to read ideas, and observations from someone else’s point of view… makes you think more.
    So please keep up the great work. Greetings.

I've got Ten Mantras for Happier Parents (based on the research for my book, How to Be a Happier Parent). They've worked for me—want to try them?

Hi, I’m KJ. Can I send you something?